Starting this December, I felt inspired to start a weekly series called #WednesdayWisdom. It’s going to be bite-size chunks of relationship-wisdom about the impact of current events on leadership and relationships.

First up: 100 Pastors Meeting with Donald Trump.

Donald Trump’s pimp-game is on some next-levelness. In order to court the black vote, he has to seem creditable among some faction of black leaders. So he meets with black church leaders for what was thought to be a listening tour. But when the Trump camp tried to pull the flim-flam and call it an “endorsement press conference”, that’s when the dung hit the fan. A raucous rebellion ensued among several black church leaders. Preachers calling each other out. Jouning on each other via Periscope, Twitter, and live on CNN. The shade was real!  Then Trump’s people were like, “Oopps…my bad. That was a mis-statement. It’s not an endorsement meeting.” And preachers were like, “Who me? Yea I was invited. But nawww…I’m not even going!”

What I find offensive to relationships is (mostly because this has happened to me before)…don’t try to pimp me out for your aggrandizement. Especially from men and women of prominence…who can use their status and influence as a carrot, or their power and control as the stick. That’s what King Xerxes did to his Queen Vashti in the bible (Ester 1). When he was drunk at a party with his boys, he told Vashti to get dressed up. He wanted to parade her in front of them for the oo’s and ah’s. But she refused to pimp herself out so that he could receive daps and pounds.

Likewise, don’t let yourself, your relationship, or the person with whom you’re in a relationship be put in a position where you’re serving the egotistical and sinful needs of another. It is permissible to serve one another out of the kindness of your heart. Yes…do that. But do your diligence. Dig past their lip-service and check their motives. What’s in it for them. Your purposes should somehow be aligned. If not, then you must draw the line at being someone else’s political/social/economic/emotional pawn.

#WednesdayWisdom

Don’t allow yourself or your relationship to be used as a pawn in someone else’s chess game.

For speaking engagements, contact me at wigginshousehold@gmail.com.